A late post but a post nonetheless

Over a weekend ago (28th July is you want to be precise), the Pirate’s very own All Scars team went on a little pilgrimage to Whakatane for a friendly WFTDA strength factor game. This would be the last game for the All Scars before they head of to the US and A for Division 2 Playoffs (Pittsburgh). .

Thank you to the Whakatane Roller Derby League for hosting the event. We would also like to thank all the volunteers, NSOs, referees and audience members who came along to this event. Special shout out to our own Purple Parfait for being an NSO ninja.


If you are still reading this article, you have the patience of a saint. I have just one last message for you all and that is follow our Facebook page! You’ll see all our pirating antics (not the illegal kind), updates about events and we sometimes give away or sell our wares and treasures online. It’s worth a peek :)Two 30mins halves, a short half-time and some timeouts in between, the final score was 97 points to WRDL and 235 points to our All Scars. But don’t let the score fool you, those points weren’t easy. Have you ever tried to push a WRDL wall? Neither. It made me nervous just watching.

It wasn’t all work and no play for our Pirates though. Between the driving, bantering, snoozing and wailing to every great song ever recorded, we managed a couple of video recordings for our social media and givealittle followers. One involved a rainbow bikini and another with a couple of litres of milk. No idea what I’m on about? Cruise on over to our Facebook page and have a look for yourself or check out our givealittle page.

We have more hilarious antics to come but only if we reach our fundraising goals. I heard laughter is a great way to develop core so donating is probably easier and cheaper than that gym membership.

Broadside Brawlers are in Japan


The Brawlers have made it to Japan.

Our mascot has been accompanying us on our travels so far and having a fantastic time as you can see in the photos below.

However he needs a name – if you have a suggestion please comment on our Facebook, twitter or instagram pages with suggestions. Prizes to be announced later.2016-03-22 08.02.35   2016-03-22 08.18.07

The Meiji Jingu Shrine (where he helped us wish for luck to win!)

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Shopping till we dropped in Harajuku.

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Trying some local cuisine.

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Whisky Tasting


Flying down to Okinawa and getting the free shuttle to our hotel.2016-03-23 09.39.19 2016-03-23 18.34.322016-03-23 22.13.49


Say hello to the formidable Missbhaven, who’s proven herself a strong and determined opponent on the track!

In her own words, here are her thoughts on her roller derby experience with PCR so far!

“Let me just preface this with… I hate doing these things, more hated than the dentist or cervical smears. That’s right, I equate doing these things to the equivalent of having my vajay-jay scraped with a popsicle stick.

missb1. What inspired your derby name and number?
My name? Ask my mom. Or my sister. Or my boyfriend… As for my number, let’s just say, “If you hide your ignorance, no one will hit you and you’ll never learn” – Ray Bradbury

2. What motivated you to join derby?
I was looking for something physical where I could be challenged, and the underground bear wrestling scene just wasn’t doing it for me (people joke that my Game of Thrones character is Brienne of Tarth). When I heard about a sport where you could legitimately crush people, both figuratively and literally, I had to give it a go.

3. What has been your greatest achievement in derby so far?
Making the All Scars squad and representing PCR in the Great Southern Slam last June. It was so great to skate against some top class teams. That, or managing to stay on my feet with a hangover and not throw up.

4. What is your favourite part about having the opportunity to play in a league with your sister Schroding-her?
I’m so glad that she has the chance to repay me for all the horrible things I did to her when we were kids.

5. What is your secret talent? (What would people be surprised to hear about you outside of derby)

This one time, at pagan camp…”

Velvet Hammer

In #Skateroftheweek this week, we get to know a bit about the amazing Velvet Hammer! This multi talented lady is blazing her way through her very first season with us playing for both The All Scars AND The Broadside Brawlers and doing a terrific job of both! We are very lucky to have her. Here’s what she has to say


1. What is the story behind your name and number?

Absolutely nothing deep and meaningful! I just wanted something girly combined with something tough. I was thinking about the “iron fist in the velvet glove” phrase, and it morphed into Velvet Hammer. And 4x(by)4 is the piece of wood you use a hammer on, of course! And the wheels we skate on too, so I was a bit chuffed at the double meaning.

2. How did you get into roller derby?

A friend of mine first mentioned it to me, and said ‘you should try it’. He just liked the flamboyance and hot pants! , but he knew I was in a dilemma about in-line because of the damage, and thought this was an obvious alternative. Then I saw Trample, Pixie and someone else show up at Barry Curtis skate park one day, and that bought it back into my mind, so I went along to freshmeat. Not sure it’s any less damaging, but at least it lets me hang out on skates with a bunch of lovely ladies instead of under age boys!

3. You’re a pretty kick ass in-line skater, how do you feel this crosses over into derby?

In-line in skate parks meant I was already used to wheels on my feet and jumping around on them, dealing with abrupt changes in balance and things like that. Although, soft quad skates with articulated trucks took a bit of getting used to, after a rigid in-line boot – I was all over the place at my first freshmeat! The rough and tumble of derby didn’t worry me either, because I’m used to impact and bruises when my tricks go wrong in skate parks. I’ve had lots of practice falling over and getting back up! I think it’s awesome that so many derby girls are ‘cross training’ in skate parks now, developing a unique quad version of freestyle/aggressive skating, and improving their skating skills along the way.

4. What do you think makes derby so unique and addictive?

I’ve been addicted to wheels on my feet ever since I first tried them. Derby involves new skills, and risk, and that pushes my buttons too. And there’s amazing camaraderie and support. Then there’s the addiction of just playing a jam well. As well as really solid skate and derby technique, you’ve got to be constantly mentally aware and analysing, and reacting really quickly, and sometimes you do that and it’s a huge buzz because you play the jam really well, and sometimes you just lose the plot completely! Ongoing work in progress…

5. Do you have a secret talent that might surprise your Derby friends?

I don’t know that it’s all that secret, but I’m a classical musician in my spare time. I play cello, in orchestras when sport allows, and I play classical piano too. Need to stop wrecking my fingers on skates!

Refs & NSOs

Our referees and NSOs are the glue that hold together our league. Without them, we wouldn’t be able to play our sport, and we’re forever grateful.

If you’re interested in becoming a referee, click here to register your interest for our next freshmeat course, where we’ll teach you everything you need to know to become one.

If you’re interested in becoming a NSO (a Non-Skating Official), please message officials@piratecityrollers.com to register your interest.


Fowl’d Out

Purple Parfait
Death by Prucifix
Reverse Engineer
Semi Sinthetic
Bad Wolf

Lady Trample

Meet our skater of the week Lady Trample. She’s been a member since 2012 and represents PCR on the All Scars as well as being a member of Team New Zealand training squad!
1.What inspired you derby name and number?
Lady Trample is a combination of Lady and the Tramp (one of my favourite Disney movies) and the song Lady is a Tramp which is a show tune from 1937 but I particularly love the cover by Frank Sinatra. My number is from a tattoo inside my lip that I got when I was 18.2. What motivated you to join derby? and how did you end up with the Pirates?
I went to my first derby game back in 2011 with my best friend Leah aka TutanKarnage. It was Alpha Beta Slammers vs Dead Wreckoning and I saw my first waitress whip and knew instantly that I wanted to play this magical sport. Me and Karnage spent the next few months teaching ourselves to skate in an underground car park avoiding security guards and signed up at the next freshmeat intake. Pirates wasn’t the only league in Auckland as ARDL had just started up and we did get invited to train with them also but I felt a bond towards this league. I have no regrets as its become a home away from home and pushed me to be the skater I am today.

3. What has been your greatest achievement in derby so far?
I was pretty stoked when I was selected for the Travel team in my first season (back in 2012) and had such wicked learning experiences at the last two TGSS tournaments (2012 & 2014) in Adelaide, but making the training squad for Team New Zealand has to be the best highlight so far and I’m working my butt off to make sure I get in that final 20 to go to Texas!

4. What has been the best thing about playing roller derby?
Roller Derby has opened a world of opportunities for me. I’ve been in music videos, movies, documentaries. Its given me an opportunity to explore new illustration and design styles. I’ve made a world of friends whom otherwise I’d never have met. I’ve always been reasonably fit and athletic but Derby has given me the motivation to push myself to my limits.

5. What is your secret talent (would people be surprised to learn about you) outside of derby? Its probably no secret but I run a page called Chicks in Bowls. This is set up to encourage and inspire derby skaters and just girls in general to get off the track and into the streets and skate parks on their roller skates. The best thing about this is the park skating improves my derby skating and vice versa. I have such a passion for both sports I honestly don’t think I could choose between them.

Pash Malice

This week in #skateroftheweek we find out all about the fabulous Pash Malice!! She normally skates with the All Scars, but has unfortunately been recovering much of the year with a back injury. This hasn’t stopped Pash from working tirelessly behind the scenes however,helping to keep the League running smoothly.

Pash Malice
1. How did you get into roller derby?

A friend of mine invited me to come to a Pirates game in early 2011. Throughout the whole game I kept asking her questions about how it worked and why the skaters were doing certain things. I fell in love with not only the physicality but also the strategy right from the start. I decided to go an open day not long after, and had ordered my derby skates even before starting freshmeat.

2. What makes you so passionate about the sport?

The sport has so many dimensions to it. Not just the athleticism, big hits, and fast jammers, but also tons of strategy, at times complex rules, and the many wonderful people involved. Regular exercise helps to keep me mentally well and until I found derby I was never able to keep up with exercise long term (woo health benefits of working out!). I’ve met people I never would have with out derby, travelled to places I probably would not have gone, and it has helped me grow as a person to boot. How can you not love something that gives you all of that?

3. You are recovering from a recent injury, what has been the hardest part and what is some advice you would give to others that you think might help them on the road to recovery?

I had to have major back surgery in June due to a severe disc prolapse in my lumber spine. It was absolutely devastating, as I was playing my best ever derby when I was injured and I missed going to TGSS with the All Scars because of it too. I think the most difficult part about it is watching my league mates continue to train and improve while I feel like I’m languishing and losing everything I worked so hard to build up.

My advice, but please take it with a grain of salt as it’s just been my experience:
1. Follow the doctors/physios orders! That includes doing all your strengthening exercises (I will admit to slipping on this too often). Coming back before you are ready can just lead to further (and often worse) injuries, and it’s simply not worth the risk.
2. Get back to skating as soon as you’re medically cleared to do so. I’ve been skating with our learn-to-derby class since I was 6 weeks post op but I won’t be going back to contact until next year. I’m trying to focus on my foundation skating skills so that when I am back, I won’t be quite so behind as I would be if I just stopped skating altogether. If I get my basic skills at least back to where they were prior to my injury, coming back to contact won’t be as difficult physically or emotionally.
3. Stay involved with your league. I’ve tried my best to keep up with my non-skating league commitments, have been NSOing at scrimmages and bench managing games for the Brawlers and All Scars. Derby often has an amazing community surrounding it – they are still there while you’re injured and can help support you on your journey back.

4. Who inspires you in the NZ derbyverse and international derbyverse?

I think anyone who has the determination to learn and pass our minimum skills is to be commended. Especially those who don’t come from a skating background – it’s hard work!
Specifically in NZ, I have come to develop a deep admiration for our All Scars coach Ruby Red Knuckles this year. Her vast derby knowledge seems to have no end and her dedication to the Pirates is incredible. She’s able to watch top international derby, tease out the strategies and then create drills and practices that teach you those strategies without you even realising it. That’s part of what makes an awesome coach and it’s a skill I want to learn.
Internationally, Jackie Daniels from Windy City has to be a favourite of mine. One reason is that I got to spend some time with her when I went to Battle on the Bent Track in Melbourne this year. Not only is she an extraordinary skater and coach, but she’s also a hilarious, down to earth person who seems to never stop smiling.

5. Do you have a secret talent that might surprise people?

Random facts: I can play the trumpet and also tie cherry stem into a knot with my mouth. (Those two things are totally related!)

Broadside Brawlers

2015 Broadside Brawlers roster

Auntie Venom
Ballistic Button
Bloody San
Bomb Appetite
Drop the Pom! (C)
Firefly Spirit
Gonna Make Ya Pei-Pei
Helen of DesTroy
Linda ShoveLACE
Mad Kao
Manic Street Creature (C)
Mass Morganizer
Pash Malice
PNut Butt-Her & Jam
Poppy Kneecaps
Rumble Stinson
Ruthless Doom
Shrew Loose
Schro Ding Her
Zombie Ablockahips


2014 Travel Team scores


Skate the Muss

In #skateroftheweek this week, we catch up with the Amazing Skate The Muss!! Always a crowd favourite, she is incredible to watch on the track and we are so proud to say that she has been selected to represent New Zealand at the world cup in Texas, where we know she will do us proud! She is also a fantastic coach, always happy to pass on her considerable knowledge and skill to all in the league.
Here’s what she has to say.10609561_10152758660387287_5634224864567323022_n


How did you get into derby?
I got into Roller Derby through my sister Terror Satana back in 2007.

What do you do to stay derby fit? 
To stay fit and on my game I like to go to the gym and do group fitness classes for cardio and I also train once a week at the Strong factory with a PT, oh yeah and I am a postie so that keeps me reasonably fit as well.

What has been your greatest achievement in derby so far?
I would say that my greatest achievement in derby so far would be attending the first Roller Derby World Cup in 2011 in Toronto where I was selected as MVP for New Zealand, that was pretty overwhelming and huge in my books.

What is the best thing about having your sister as a team mate/league mate?
The best thing about having my sister playing with me not only in PCR but the New Zealand squad too is knowing that she is always going to have my back no matter what goes down. I also love skating against her because she is an intimating skater and I love a challenge. She would probably be one of the biggest ones in New Zealand.